Eric Jarosinski's Nein. A Manifesto PDF

By Eric Jarosinski

A gleeful but severe philosophical manifesto in aphorism via the writer of the highly well known @NeinQuarterly Twitter feed, written within the related “crisp, allusive, irreverent” (New Yorker) voice.


• Ontology: what the fuck?
• Causality: why the fuck?
• Epistemology: how the why the fuck?
• Phenomenology: the fuck.

Nein. A Manifesto is the brainchild of Eric Jarosinski, the self-described “failed intellectual” at the back of the highly renowned @NeinQuarterly, a “Compendium of Utopian Negation” that makes use of the aphorism to plumb the existential abyss of contemporary life—and unearths it bottomless.

Stridently hopeless and charmingly dour, Nein. A Manifesto mixes depression with nihilistic glee in its research into the main pressing questions. And the least. encouraged by way of the philosophical aphorisms of Nietzsche and Theodor W. Adorno, Jarosinski’s epigrammatic type reinvents short-form philosophy for an international doomed to distraction.

Nein. A Manifesto should be packaged as an enticing exchange paperback, every one web page including its personal four-line manifesto. serious thinkers, fanatics of language, bibliophiles, manics and depressives alike may be attracted to this compelling, witty, playfully irreverent translation of electronic into print. idea into praxis. And tragedy into farce.

“I hate Twitter, i feel it's going to be prohibited—but Jarosinski’s Nein. is the single exception, the single cause that justifies it! he's like a thorough Norman Bates from Psycho intervening together with his tweets that are like speedy cuts with a knife!” —Slavoj Žižek

“Witty and droll ... There are gem stones on approximately each web page. The ebook might sound tongue-in-cheek, yet Jarosinski’s cynical aphorisms approximately philosophy, artwork, language, and literature carry lots of fact. it's the excellent antidote to the relentless positivity of the stereotypical self-help manual.” —Publishers Weekly

“A hilarious manifesto of dystopian epigrams. Nein. is the satan in your shoulder, now in your shelf.” —Ben Schott, writer of Schott’s Miscellany and Schottenfreude: German phrases for the Human Condition

Nein. celebrates every thing that it negates. it truly is quietly, joyously bleak. Will you get pleasure from it? might be larger to invite: are you able to make sure that you’ve ever loved anything?” —MC Frontalot

“The best possible piece of writing I’ve encountered on Twitter . . . Aphoristic, and but hinting at a intensity of data underneath.” —Los Angeles Times

“[Jarosinski] distills tricky philosophical options into triumphs of pith.” —Slate

“A high-wire stroll among low and high tradition that explodes all assumptions in regards to the barriers of the German language and humor.” —The Irish Times

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Sample text

But when turning her head at an extreme angle fails to produce a life-altering epiphany, she usually just shortcircuits and rolls onto her back. Over the past two months, she’s made some progress, but it’s been painfully slow and is easily forgotten. Still, I was living under the assumption that maybe my dog just had a hidden capacity for intelligence—that all I had to do was work hard enough and maybe she’d wake up one day and be smart and capable like a normal dog. But one night I was sitting on my couch mindlessly surfing the Internet when I looked up and noticed my dog licking the floor.

I put the biscuit under the cup and started the timer. My dog ran over to the cup and sniffed it. She walked around it once and then looked up at me like I was some sort of wizard. I pointed to the cup. I knew it was cheating, but I wanted to help my dog pass her test. She didn’t understand, but she knew she was supposed to do something, so she just started frantically doing things because maybe—just maybe—one of those things would be the right thing and the magical wizard cup would let her know where the treat went.

Dear other iterations of my past self, Thank you for not being so goddamn weird that I felt I had to address you personally in a letter from the future. I commend you. A lingering fear of mine was confirmed last night: my dog might be slightly retarded. I’ve wondered about her intelligence ever since I adopted her and subsequently discovered that she was unable to figure out how stairs worked. I blamed her ineptitude on the fact that she’d spent most of her life confined to a small kennel because her previous owners couldn’t control her.

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